Finding Patience at 39 Weeks is Hard

Patience. It was definitely not handed out to me in abundance when God was handing out virtues. I have gained a lot of patience since becoming a teacher and mother, but not enough. I have zero patience when it comes to waiting for things. I hate waiting. I can't even wait to give gifts at birthdays! Waiting for this little boy to be born is driving me crazy. I feel like I'm stuck in limbo. I have written about waiting before when my sister was pregnant (when she was also 39 weeks pregnant, interestingly enough). 

Taken by Snow Pea Portraits

I am the most pregnant I have ever been. I went into labour with E at 38 weeks and 4 days. He was born the following morning, ten days early. I am now 39 weeks and 2 days pregnant with this current little boy. When I think that I could potentially have almost three more weeks of this, I want to throw up a little. Okay, a lot. My body can't handle much longer. Heck, my patience can't handle much longer! I have to continually remind myself to take a breath while I am dealing with the various toddler issues that can pop up during the day. Some days, I feel like the worst mom in the world when I knowingly overreact to something E has done. I often wonder if those moments will overpower his memories instead of everything else. I try so hard to use gentle parenting techniques but, lately, it has been so hard to do.

I am also tired of the comments from strangers about how big I am and how I must be "ready to pop." UGH! While grocery shopping the other day, I had an older man joke that I was trying to steal a watermelon. I was so confused because I had a watermelon IN my cart, and then I realized what he meant and half-heartedly laughed and continued on my way. Today, while doing errands, I had at least three people ask me if the baby was coming "any day now." I have been trying to keep myself busy so that I don't think about what isn't happening, and all of these comments just remind me yet again! I know that pregnancy is an exciting time and that other people are often intrigued by it, but please, give the huge, pregnant lady a break! Smile if you want, but please don't ask me when the baby is coming (mostly because I DON'T KNOW. Babies come when they come!). I feel like replying, "Oh, still a few more months...I'm only 6 months pregnant!" just to see what they would say.

I know just a couple of weeks ago I said that I was going to cherish the last moments of this pregnancy. I am trying to do that. But it is hard. I really, really, really just want to meet this little man. I just have to keep telling myself that it will happen soon. Really soon. And to my friends and family, don't worry...I won't keep him hidden away and not tell you!