meditations of a blueberry

  You don't choose your family.  They are God's gift to you, as you are to them.   ~Desmond Tutu When we got married, we had the belief that we were starting our own family and that when we had kids we would be focusing on our own little unit. That belief was strengthened when we had E and I am glad that both of us feel that it is important to do so. But that doesn't make me miss my other family any less. In fact, I miss them more. And as I have gotten older, I have realized what a blessing my family is and how much I appreciate them. Since having E, every day I wish that we lived closer to my parents and siblings. Since high school (over 10 years ago, yikes!), I have lived away from home. And not just away meaning not at home, but hours away. In Lethbridge, we were 5.5 hours away. Luckily, in Lethbridge I was blessed to be close to a fabulous aunt who was always there for me and provided not only love, but meals and comfort when our bank account was less than full

If I thought that nobody had prepared me for breastfeeding a toddler, then I was absolutely unprepared for breastfeeding a toddler while pregnant. When we began the journey of trying to conceive this baby, I knew that the breastfeeding relationship that E and I had established would change and grow and possibly end. It's just a sad fact that some babies will wean when the mother gets pregnant, due to multiple reasons (less milk, change in taste, etc). I had hoped that this wouldn't be the case with E, but I was (am) determined to take things day by day. While I secretly hope to tandem nurse the new baby and E, I did not want to get my hopes up expecting him to not wean. I know several ladies whose milk dried up in the first trimester, and knew I would be heartbroken if he weaned when I was expecting to nurse him longer. But here we are. Seventeen weeks in, and no sign of weaning from my 18 month old yet. E is still nursing the same amount, more or less, than he was prior to th