meditations of a blueberry

What do they see? Who do they see? I often wonder that when I pass someone on my runs (especially my 6 am runs ).  I remember back before embarking on this journey what I would think when I saw runners outside in the snow and cold: "they're crazy!" Is that what people see when they see me? Just another crazy runner? Someone who should really learn what a treadmill is? Or do they see more? Is it possible that, underneath all these layers, they can catch a glimpse of the person I see when I look in the mirror?   I wonder if they see the mother of two young children. The mother who has made choices for her children, like home birth , that do not quite fall into the realm of "mainstream." The teacher who has chosen to stay at home for those children, even though some days she misses the classroom and all those challenges. The mother who some days wonders if she made the right choices in her life . The mother who some days wonders if she is cut out to ...

The streetlight shines in through the window blinds as Journey's "Don't Stop Believing" begins playing on my alarm. What a perfect song to describe this process of marathon training . I let it play for a few seconds longer as I allow myself to slowly wake up. Asha, on the other hand, is up immediately and staring at me beside the bed, waiting to go. The warm baby beside me deep in sleep snuggles in closer and I take one more minute to breathe in his peacefulness. Then, I slowly slip out of bed and quietly sneak out of the room with Asha excitedly following behind me. Checking the weather to see how many layers I need on, I begin to get dressed and eat a banana. I've learned that I need to eat something small before heading out. After layering up, I slip on my shoes, tie them on, grab the dog's leash, and head on out.   It snowed last night, and something about making those first tracks in the snow is magical. It's so cold out that the streetlights in the...

http://www.runfergus.com/2011/11/dressing-for-winter-running.html My journey has started. I have officially been training for my half-marathon for one week. I plan to blog every week or two about my journey. I'm anticipating it being an emotional, and a physical journey. I can not run well, but I will be a runner. Last Saturday, we had our training kick-off. We got to meet our trainers, mentors, and other team mates. We got our training schedule, and I must admit that I may have had a mini heart attack when I read it. Yikes. I'm not sure if I have ever exercised as much as I will be in the next few months--not even in high school during basketball or track season.  I must admit that I am a little scared. My body is not the shape nor size of a runner's body. But I can do this. I WILL do this. I'm determined. For my boys, and for myself.  After meeting everyone, we went for a group run. It was only 30 minutes, but it was hard. I was slow. I felt so completely out ...